Oct 17, 2006

Boca Redux.



Again.

Somehow I feel that Johann Strauss' "The Blue Danube Waltz" should be playing, and I should be wearing shoes with Velcro soles.

Oct 16, 2006

Batch'n it.



While the wife's away on extended new-baby duty, I've begun to dig deeper and deeper into the freezer for sustenance. Last night's foraging brought forth this Boca Lasagna with "100% REAL Soy Protein" (including real soy protein gristle). Pretty tasty, actually, and supposedly better for me than the frozen pizza and pot-pie I had for dinner the last two nights.

Maybe I'll do it again this evening (I think I saw its mate a little further back).

Oct 10, 2006

The Comfort Food Gospel. Is this the mainline church of America?


Pastor



Bishop



Evangelist

List of comfort foods

While any foods or beverages could be considered comfort foods, there are many in the U.S. that might be considered 'universally' accepted comfort foods. Most comfort foods in the U.S. are regional in nature, such as collard greens in the South, or a hotdish in the Upper Midwest. Following is a short list of some common universally accepted American comfort foods. The same rules tend to apply internationally, where nationality, regional history and ethnicity tend to define what foods are considered comfort foods.

Apple Pie

Bagel with Cream Cheese

Bagel with Cream Cheese and Lox

Baked Apples

Baked Potato

BBQ Ribs

Beans

Biscuits

Bread

Bread Pudding

Brownies

Carrot Cake

Cheese Danish

Cheesecake

Chicken Fried Steak

Chicken Noodle Soup

Chicken Pot Pie

Chili

Chinese cuisine

Cinnamon Rolls

Chocolate

Chocolate Chip Cookies

Cole Slaw

Collard Greens

Corned Beef on Rye

Cornbread

Corn Chips

Corn (creamed)

Corn Dogs

Corn (on/off the cob)

Crab Cakes

Cupcakes

Étouffée (Crawfish or shrimp)

Fajitas

French Fries

French Toast

Fried Catfish

Fried Chicken

Garlic Bread

Grilled Cheese

Gumbo

Ice Cream

Hamburger

Hamburger with garnishes of that individual's choosing

Hot Dish

Hot Dog

Key Lime Pie

Lasagne

Macaroni and Cheese

Mashed Potatoes

Matzo Ball Soup

Meatloaf

Milk Toast

Noodle Kugel

Oatmeal

Omelette

Onion Rings

Pasta

Pancakes

Peach Cobbler

Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich

Pecan Pie

Philly Cheesesteak

Pizza

Potato Chips

Potato Latkes

Potato Salad

Prunes

Rice

Rice Krispie Treats

Rice Pudding

Roast Beef

Rotisserie Chicken

Scrapple

Shepherd's Pie

Soup (particularly Chicken Noodle Soup)

Spaghetti

Stir Fry

Stuffed Peppers

Turkey and Stuffing with Cranberry Sauce

Waffles


Isaiah 40

Comfort for God's People
1 Comfort, comfort my people,
says your God.

2 Speak tenderly to Jerusalem,
and proclaim to her
that her hard service has been completed,
that her sin has been paid for,
that she has received from the LORD's hand
double for all her sins.


There you have it. We believe we've earned our "comfort" from God.

We go to church to be comforted by indulging in a guilty pleasure. We come for a sweet-treat reward for our week of being "good". We clamor after spiritual candy, happily paying for a banana-split for the soul.

We know the fattening intake of empty calories is bad for us, so we limit our intake. We save God for a once-a-week indulgence ("Sunday morning Happy Hour"), or for "special occasions" likes Christmas, Easter,weddings, christenings, and funerals.

Longing for false childhood memories of "home", we have become spiritual-food junkies. We are loyal to our name-brand religions, addicted to their sugar-coated gospels, deep-fried discipleship, and a creme-filled christ on a wafer.

Where's the meat? We'd gag on the raw meat of Jesus. We need beef-jerky and salt-pork for our long journey, but we pack Snickers and fruit roll-ups (some who take their "religion" seriously take trail mix to keep their bowels regular).

In the Land of Plenty, we load up on Good-N-Plentys. Our bellies distend, our teeth become perforated. We sense a problem, so we switch to Diet Coke as a spiritual discipline during the week.

Enabled by the clerical Ronald McDonald, Jack, and the Burger King,
we are going to hell via the drive-through. Will that be cash, credit, or debit?

Did I mention the cost? It's cheap grace.

Oct 6, 2006

Meet June Anne LaGrone.



June Anne LaGrone in the arms of her Grandmother, Linden Summer.
June Anne, daughter of Catherine and Riley LaGrone, arrived yesterday at 1:20 PM (following about 12 hours of drug-free labor).

June Anne is named after my mother Freda June, and my sister June Ann. In Heaven, they take delight in this little earth-bound angel's arrival.

It is within the realm of statistical probablility that June is the 300th million American.

Oct 2, 2006

How we "do" church.



We "do church" mostly by keeping our eyes fixed on our rearview mirrors.

We focus on what used to be, and on where we've been. We watch it all shrink in size, and we flip the high-beam guard down should any "bright lights" come up behind us to pass.


We don't look where we are going. We don't look toward our destination. We swerve across the road, forcing others into the ditch.

We miss turns. We run red lights. We drive off the road, and see it as something in the past. We live our lives as the church in reverse.

We've forgotten where we're supposed to be going, mistaking where we came from for our destination.

WARNING: Objects in mirror are further away than they appear.

But along the way, off the wide road, people walk toward the destination ahead. Some are running. Many have gotten out of the broken down and wrecked cars that litter the roadside. Pedestrians have no need of rearview mirrors. They walk by light and compass.

Luke 9:62 (New International Version)

Jesus replied, "No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God."

One Hundred and Seventy One Years Ago Today.